Why accidentally erasing my hard drive might be the best thing that ever happened to me

I talk a lot about things happening for a reason, the grand master plan of the Universe, synchronicity, and the overall meant-to-be or not-meant-to-be-ness of life. And it’s pretty easy to stay on my fairy dust and sparkles train when everything is going smoothly, I’m meeting the right people, cash flow is good, and I’m proverbially walking on sunshine.

And then sometimes believing it’s all meant to be is not so easy.

On Thursday night at 2:00AM I somehow managed to erase all of my video footage from the past year from my hard drive and external hard drive. Then I proceeded to empty the trash. A combination of being overtired, multi-tasking, and being a little bit giddy after a fun evening out led to my “accidental” erasing behavior.

Every episode of Glimpse TV that’s not yet been edited and published (of which there were at least ten), every Team Northrup success story and testimonial, and every minute of footage of every presentation and seminar I’ve given this year….gone. And entire year’s evidence of transformation and great content erased.

So what’s a girl to do when faced with sudden, abrupt, and uninvited letting go?

Being the dutiful Aries I am, I sprung into action immediately. I Googled “restore emptied trash Mac” and found a great article on Squidoo that gave me a step-by-step protocol to follow. I obediently downloaded the recovery software and paid $99 for it. I followed the steps to recover the data. It didn’t work. I took my Mac to the Genius Bar at the Apple Store. They told me they couldn’t fix it. I bought a new external drive to save the recovered files to (another $104.) I tried my scanning software again, spent 24 hours scanning my computer, and then found that none of the recovered files were useable.

Finally, this morning I hauled myself to TekServe to see if the cute computer nerds up there could fix it. After scanning and questioning and investigating, the guy told me they might be able to recover some of the data, but that it would take more than a week and it would cost me $860. So at 10:00AM I said, “F*ck it! I’m letting it go.”

The universe must be up to something that I’m not in on.

I’m about to say goodbye to life as I know it and live in the vast unknown as I embark on a road trip indefinitely in February 2011. I’m selling my apartment. I’m getting rid of most of my stuff. I’m giving my two websites a face lift. I’m restructuring my company. And I’m completely, and sometimes terrifyingly, aware that I have no freaking clue what my life is going to look like a year from now…or even two months from now. My life is under construction and there’s dust everywhere.

It’s a times like this – when we inadvertently erase our hard drive, have a laptop full of irreplaceable photos stolen, lose a box of memorabilia in a move, have our childhood drawings ruined by water damage in the basement, etc.-  that it’s good to believe in something bigger than ourselves. It’s at times like this that I wonder how people who don’t believe in some kind of God even get out of bed in the morning. It’s at times like this that I’m incredibly grateful to my mom for raising me to believe in God/Goddess/fairies/mermaids/divinity/Universal Power/talking trees/etc. It’s at times like this that I realize that the universe must be up to something that I’m not in on (at least not consciously.)

There are no accidents.

While communing over hot cups of Yerba Mate in stocking feet the morning after the “big erase”, Gabby Bernstein reminded me that “accidentally” erasing my hard drive is most likely a sign to move in a new direction with my content. Earlier in the day before I trashed all my video interviews and seminar footage I got the insight that as much as guest content is great, my readers actually want to hear from me and hear what I have to say. (Thank you Bindu Wiles for saying this in your interview with Satya.)

Is it a mistake, then, that just as I’m about to launch into the unknown on a journey about freedom that I would “accidentally” trash all my unpublished content? Nope. There are no accidents. Miss Bernstein is right: Time for a new direction. Time for more of me and less hiding. Enough with thinking that my guests have more to say than I do. Enough with thinking I’m not enough.

My apologies to all the Glimpse TV guests whose interviews I lost. I trust that when/if we meet again to re-shoot, we’ll be even more brilliant and say even more life-changing things. (Plus, with the money I saved not restoring my lost data I’ll have a higher quality camera to make you look and sound better.)

In the coming months you can look forward to more delicious, practical, and scintillating content on the art, science, and practice of loving life, it just may have a different flavor. I’m taking the “big erase” as a sign and I’m currently recalibrating. Stay tuned for what emerges from this pregnant pause.

And now I’d love to hear from you:

  • Do you have any stories of loss that turned out to be a blessing?
  • Is there anything in your life that you think should have turned out differently than it is? Can you think of at least one reason why it’s “perfect” that it’s happening exactly as it’s happening? (Get a free audio of my mom and I leading you through “Finding the ‘Right’ in Every Situation” by joining my list.)
  • Where do you stand on the belief that everything happens for a reason?
  • Anything you desire to see from Glimpse TV or any of my content now that I got the memo that it’s time to change directions?

Leave a comment. I’m seriously interested in what you have to say.

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39 Responses to Why accidentally erasing my hard drive might be the best thing that ever happened to me

  1. I am a pretty enormous fan of the accidental erase. When I read your title I got that goose bump feeling of asking the Universe for something and not knowing what it’s going to look like. When it shows up it always starts with a knock you over bang!!!! I love those gifts.

    My entire business was lost when the dog knocked over the computer. We managed to retrieve every file except for that one. I had been wanting to fly in another direction and it turned out to be the letting go that opened up the space for the shift. (It was hard those first days though)

    My favorite posts of yours are in your voice. That’s how I discovered you and will look forward to the magic that you are going to bring us.

    • Kate says:

      Wow. That is quite the intense story Hannah. Isn’t it interesting how the Universe picks for us…that the one file you “needed” was the one file you lost. Thanks for your affirmation on me posting more me!

  2. Danielle says:

    I love this. I read this and *feel* that this was absolutely meant to be. Of course there are no accidents. I too have been hiding or “slow cooking” as Gabby puts it. I’m healing and preparing and have had to let go of a LOT of things I had convinced myself I “needed” along the way. Thank-you for sharing this Kate. It helps me remember that as long as I do each day that which I love and feel called to do, I am doing all I can with what I have. In this way I am sharing my gifts and talents with the world. In this way I am healing. In this way I am becoming more of who I am!

  3. Thea says:

    I love this story! I too believe that shit happens exactly as it is supposed to and when it is supposed to, often coming in the form of dispair at the time. Congrats to you for letting go and giving in to the universe…this brings me to a question I often struggle with…when are you “giving in to the universe” and when are you “giving up & waiting for the universe to solve your problems”???

    BTW…I have no doubt you and I will connect in the future, my intuitive nature can feel it..and the universe will dictate when :)

    • Kate says:

      Great question Thea. I think that you have to do the best you can with the information you’re given. So Googleing a solution, going to get something fixed, asking for help, and all of that is a great start. And if you just keep heading dead end after dead end you just have to let go! Looking forward to connecting in perfect timing.

  4. Kristin Genovese says:

    You are so freaking inspiring, I can barely stand it. Seriously. I’m so ready to be on the constant personal growth train (as a Team Northrup member I’m headed in that direction), and every time I read one of your posts I leave with an extreme amount of sudden energy and ambition to better myself and further my journey. I’m always ready to take action RIGHT NOW, no kidding. So thank you for that, again. :)

  5. Susan says:

    Thanks, Kate!

    You made me feel a lot better about losing my new camera on the USANA cruise!

  6. Monique says:

    Thank you for this post. I gave me peace and inspiration.
    2011 will be so exciting!

  7. Mayr says:

    Kate — I love you and mom so much! You ladies rock!!! Thanks for sharing so much love, information and wisdom. I love receiving your emails. I am currently going through a similar “upheaval”. The universe gifted me with a suddent “residency” move, due to circumstances beyond my control. I am a single mom, with a 12 year old. Since her birth, for one reason or another, I have had to move every few years. I thought the place I was currently in would last a few years longer than it did, as I only moved here a little over a year ago. Once the inner child in me stopped panicking and freaking out, I too, realized there is bigger picture I do not see right now and it’s all for the best. So with that thought in mind, which has helped me thru so many situations, once I released and let go, it all started to flow more smoothly. Thanks for sharing!

  8. when i read about things like this happening, all i can do is laugh………and hope that you are laughing with me. everything is so perfect all the time. it’s a huge blessing to open my email and read about people like you, kate, who get this too. you have been given the whole world to play in, why would you limit your world to your hard drive!!!
    big hugs!

  9. Kate says:

    @elizabeth martel, Thank you! I did laugh when it happened. What else can you do, right? I LOVE the idea that I have the whole world so why be limited by a hard drive. Genius!

  10. Kate says:

    @Kristin Genovese, Awesome Kristin! I LOVE your energy too. So happy to have you on Team Northrup and to have you on the personal growth train.

  11. Kathie says:

    Neale Donald Walsh (author of Conversations with God) says that god is always talking with us, we’re just not always listening. Congrats Kate on listening to the conversation. An ego based person would be all over that drama and everyone would be wrong. It would feel good (ego based people love the drama) for a minute or two and then empty again.
    In your situation, you listened to your higher self and saw the wisdom waiting there for you. I for one can’t wait to hear what you ahve to say! All of the wise teachers…every single one of them is a someone from somewhere starting at some point. It looks like your starting point is now.
    I have a little story for you….last winter the place I work burnt to the ground….it had been my work home for about 22 years. It was a devistating event as anyone who ahs been through a fire can attest. Nobody was hurt and our company was able to relocate to another building without skipping a beat. As difficult as that refocusing period was, a number of wonderful things happened. I had been uncomfortable for some time before the fire with aspects of the culture in the workplace; I longed to be closer to my home in the country. After the fire, the deparement I work in was sent to work elsewhere as well as work at home. So, I’m in the office at my dining room table looking out at the frozen river, thinking….thank you, thank you, thank you. Cool story, right?

  12. Sylvie Wheeler says:

    Hi Kate, I simply would like to say that if I have really appreciated all your guests on Glimpse TV (and thanking you very much for this sharing and kind of communion…), I’ve joined your site because of You, of your Spirit and of the incredible generosity and Light I have sensed. So I’m delighted to know I am going to hear and discover a lot more of You. So Hallelujiah for this outcome of your computer misshap!
    Mercury(information) being retrograde, this kind of things are bound to happen, in capricorn and in a conjunction with Pluto activating the North Node etc…etc…well, all structures (and who’s really the boss?)..are bound to be deeply & seriously examined, new ones erected and old ones trashed. Gentleness and a deliberate conscious -go slow- mode is good as Mars has now joined the party. Great energy: to use wisely.
    Personally, I wish I would have understood the point you’re making today when I was much younger. Like Benjamin Zander, I’ve always sensed that to be a true leader one had to be silent, conduct and foster the presentation of everyone else’s Light. So true…yet our strengths can also be our weaknesses. It all depends on what we do with it all and for me it’s a dance, a great Dance. Do I want to learn the steps of a war beat/path or do I want to learn those of exquisite Beauty? I have grown weary of applying any kind of band-aid to situations and now prefer to contemplate what would happen if I just accepted the world as it came to me? I cherish the Mystery and orient myself to ‘how best can I foster Beauty and Excellence at this time?’ It’ s a choice. I just know that each time I chose successfully, I tasted, felt and became that a little bit more. Yet, it never seems to amaze me how my mind always seeks clear verbal rationalization of my life. So… back to the dance floor…
    With much love and all Blessings

  13. Eileen Callahan says:

    After a fire destroyed all his memorobilia, including the famous “Rosebud” sled, Orson Welles asserted that it was something that should happen to everyone at least once in their lifetime.

    Kate, I really admire your ability to know when to move on, and I loved the comment about having the whole world, so why limit yourself to your hard drive?

    I struggle with believing that the world is abundant, and so sometimes have trouble letting go of things. Losses like this can be such good (if hard) lessons!

    May much wonderful stuff come to you to refill your hard drive – now you’ve got room for it all!

  14. Dalice says:

    Ha! I don’t know why but this writing touched me somehow. You would think it might be an empathy to the pain but it was more of a rememberance of liberation and joy that has come out of many situations just like this for me! Like a vacuume for more joy/god/energy to pour in! Cheers to you on your journey! I have taken many leaps like you are about to and they make life soooo much richer!

  15. Simone says:

    Ah! Same thing happened to me, but I’m afraid I probably was even worse in my desperation. I dropped my hard-drive and did a whole lot of googling. One place suggested putting it in the freezer, this was from a techy forum…that didn’t work- he he! Then I searched on youtube, and found a data recovery explaining the procedure of trying to getting it back…it was very complicated. I tried, but without much luck. I even emailed him to see if I could ship it to America as it would cost $2000 to get fixed in Australia.

    I went through such a freenzy when it happened. The lesson I have learnt is to back-up on multiple hard-drives and with an external provider. But my whole portfolio from my job with a television station was gone :( Spew.

  16. Jolanda says:

    Great story, like the Team Northrup call
    “the Freedom of letting go”. My computer
    crashed this year, lost everything ;(
    My time was too much absorbed , and accomplished
    hardly anything. That’s how I finally
    got the message to live, focus more on my life!!
    Thanks Kate, (I’m still sad of loosing all my pictures:(

    • Kate says:

      @Jolanda, Thanks Jolanda. It’s true, there are some things that we lose that are precious and irreplaceable, but it seems they are far outweighed by the loss of things that it was time to let go of!

  17. Kate says:

    @Dalice, Yes to the vacuum. I’m living in it big time. Feels good. Feels scary. Feels rich with possibility!

  18. Cat says:

    Wow Kate, I think I would’ve lost it if I’d lost all that information!
    I do, however, feel that everything happens for a reason. If I hadn’t been diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in 2000, I wouldn’t have learned so much about health, nutrition and the human body. I also wouldn’t be a certified Nutrition Coach, as I am now. I’m eternally grateful for this gift and enjoy using the information I’ve gained because of it!

    Thanks for being you!
    C@

  19. Karen Armstrong says:

    Kate, I have a feeling that the “accidental” loss of your hard drive is leading you to a very BIG WIN in your life. Looking forward to hearing about what the Universe has in store for you for 2011!

  20. Signa says:

    This is the first time I’ve been to your website…ever….and I have to say that your style of writing is fabulous, personable, and AUTHENTIC. Please don’t change a thing as I’ll be back looking for more.

    I know the agony of losing something you never expected to lose, but isn’t that part of this journey we call “life”? We are never in control, even when we think we are, and it’s important to remember that we take a lot for granted (like the eternal life of our computer files). In order to love life, you have to be willing to be in (and LOVE) the here and now….whatever form it happens to take. That’s a hard thing to do when it’s an “abrupt, uninvited, letting go”….but THAT is the real test of our chutzpa…of whether we can “walk the walk”. It sounds to me like you will be the better for it….and I believe that we, your readers, will be too.

  21. There are no accidents. This was a creation of the Universe, you or a combination of. I believe that everything happens for a reason. Check out my recent blog on Missing the Bus.
    http://onewomanseye.blogspot.com/2010/12/missing-bus.html

    My intuition tells me you are on to something bigger and better :)))

  22. Kate says:

    @Karen Armstrong, Thank you Karen! I’ll continue to post about what’s cooking :)

  23. Kate says:

    @Signa, Great to meet you Signa! I’m so glad you enjoyed what you read and I enjoyed your post right back. Keep on coming back for more as the stories unfold…and keep sharing yours too. I absolutely adore the word chutzpa…thanks for sneaking that one in there :)

  24. Kate says:

    @Joanne Tombrakos, Big things are cooking over here. Gotta keep digesting and dancing to make sure I stay present with all the expansion. I’ll head over and read your post now!

  25. Rebecca says:

    Oh Kate, I had a similar experience in January 2009, as I was clearing out the old to embark on a completely different journey…THREE motherboards, two hard drives, one optical drive and eight weeks later, I finally had a functioning laptop. I came to the same conclusion as you, but it took me a bit longer. You have big magical change in your near future. Enjoy every moment of your wonderful journey! These are special times.

  26. Nancy Nereson says:

    Hi Kate,
    This post reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. ” One thing I have learned in my wandering life my friends, is to never consider anything a misfortune til you have seen the end of it. Is not every hour a fresh point of view?”

    Lately I’ve been thinking along the lines that there is no such thing as loss, only transformation.

    Easy to say for me because it wasn’t my hard drive but there is spectacular beauty in the way the we work with the universe.

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